Pour yourself some coffee and open your heart to hear from my SOFH friend, Grace, as she shares what she has learned in the midst of loneliness and allow her prayer to wash love over your heart.
There
are many seasons to singleness. Sometimes we feel engulfed with loneliness,
sometimes we are overcome with envy toward those who have what we want, and
sometimes—I wish it were more often—we are content, simply, joyfully happy with
where God has us and looking toward a promising future, wherever He may send
us. But for me, anyway, I find loneliness to be the most frequently-visiting
season.
Hard
Questions
Loneliness
can be frustrating. Christ is supposed to always be with us…right? He even gave
us His Spirit during our time on earth. If God is dwelling in us, how can we
feel so intensely alone at times?
Furthermore,
why does God allow excruciating heartbreak? Why does He force some of us to sit
on the sidelines while those around us enjoy boy/girlfriends and spouses? Why
does He give us desires for marriage and families and then not fulfill them?
Although
he was by no means single, King David well understood the grief of loneliness,
and he wrestled through many painful questions with God. In fact, Psalm 13
contains some surprisingly bold queries David directed to his Creator: “How
long, O LORD? Will You forget me forever? How long will You hide Your face from
me?” And in Psalm 22, he asks, “My God, my God, why have You forsaken me? … O
my God, I cry by day, but You do not answer…”
These
prayers were borne from immense pain and convey raw emotions toward
God—questioning what the author could not understand and challenging the Lord
to answer his cries.
A
Hard Answer
It is
okay to ask God questions like this. He wants to hear our prayers. (Psalm 62:8)
But sometimes, we may not get an answer—at least not right away. Or we may get
an answer we don’t want.
Job
knew this, and he responded to his trials the best way he could: without sin.
“The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away. Blessed be the name of the LORD.”
(Job 1:21)
Everything
is the Lord’s. All of us—our hearts, our desires, our loneliness, our pain.
Jesus died for it all. It all belongs to Him.
A
Heavenly Truth
God
does give and He does take away. But while He often takes things away, they are
always earthly things. He will never take away His heavenly gifts of peace,
comfort, love, joy, and wisdom. These perfect blessings we so desperately need
and can’t survive without He “gives generously and without reproach.” (James
1:5)
We
may feel lonely, but we are never alone. We may feel empty, but we are never
without God’s love and care, even when we can’t see it. We may feel
despondent, but we always have hope. And we have the reward of Christ to look
forward to.
We
must press through, dear Christian. We must pray to Him when we’re down in the
valley. We must pursue His love when we don’t feel connected to Him. In fact,
this is precisely when we must chase after Him the hardest. After all, He isn’t
the one who moved.
An
Honest Prayer
Dear
Lord, I am lonely. I’m not always sure how to pray. There are times my faith
feels nonexistent, times the sorrows of the world are crushing me and I can’t
even breathe. Times I am overwhelmed.
But
at the same time, my faith is determined. I will not stop crying out to You.
Holy Spirit, intercede for me with Your unutterable groanings. (Romans 8:26) Jesus, intercede for me as You
promise to continually do for those who love You. (Romans 8:34)
God,
I feel defeated. I am at times consumed by my desire for companionship. Cleanse
me of this obsession and turn my wandering heart to You. Fill me with Your
peace, joy, and love, which You promise, and which You will never take away.
Right
now, You are withholding something I desperately want. But make me desperate
for You. Turn my desires to You so that I will delight myself in You and You
will give me the desires of my heart—more of You. (Psalm 37:4)
You
know me inside and out. You know my desires and dreams. You know my heart,
mind, and soul better than anyone ever could. (Psalm 139) Lord, I trust You with
everything. My wants, my sorrows, and my loneliness—they all belong to You. You
died for them. Take them, Jesus. I bring them before You and cast them upon
Your perfect love. (1 Peter 5:7) Thank You for carrying my griefs and
sins so I don’t have to. I love You. Amen.
He
will answer us, dear sisters. We must fight the good fight, finish the course,
and keep the faith even when we are at our loneliest. And the God of all peace
will be with us. He is by our side. He intercedes for us. And He will never let
us go no matter how lonely we feel. We are never alone.
Grace
is an Indiana native and the owner of Writing Life, a writing and editing service. She has a deep love of
Christian filmmaking and works on set as a script supervisor whenever she can.
An office supplies hoarder, she is an organization fiend at work and a little
more "relaxed" at home. She loves her Savior and she loves people,
and she is always looking to make new connections. A few of her favorite things
are coffee, deep conversations, and long walks.
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